Well I have read all the books, done some pretty comprehensive guides on the subject and spoken to dozens of fans, alienated boyfriends, and experts in psychiatry to determine what the best course of action is when young women get too involved in the world of twilight.
A little backstory: Twilight is a novel by Stephanie Meyer, a 35 year old housewife who upon “seeing it in a dream” wrote the manuscript for Twilight. And to translate “seeing it in a dream”, it actually means she watched Underworld and Buffy and read Anne Rice and Christopher Pikes “vampire Chronicles” and ripped them off all in one book. Just Like Harry Potter and The Da Vinci Code.
Now, most girls that read this novel will admit that it isn’t of a high caliber. So what compels them to read? What is it about Edward Cullen (the love interest of the protagonist) that makes girls swoon? We will discover all these things and more in part 2. For now lets focus on a comprehensive in depth guide to tell your girlfriend BEFORE they read the book:
“Twilight is gay. LOTR FTW!”
The End.
Until Next Time I Remain…. Glittering in the sunlight like a panzy tool.